It was an early October WEST event. Dr. Amy Rebecca Gay had just started her presentation on self-advocacy and negotiating-while-womaning. I wasn’t expecting the rip tide surge of emotion. It barely touched the surface, but it took the room underwater with a collective two-beat sigh, an almost visible miasma of bang-your-head-against-the-wall frustration. Dr. Gay had just explained Dr. Hannah Riley Bowles’ observation that women pay a ‘social cost’ for effectively negotiating for themselves even when the same exact behaviors and outcomes earn men respect and a social capital bonus. Insert two-beat sigh here. Innnnn, and oooooout.
How can it be 2019 and yet the majority of society still clings to antiquated stigmas like your creepy cousin who won’t give up on Google Glass? The blatant and shameless injustice of the situation that makes you truly resent management and sometimes your colleagues too. And worse, there’s that gross feeling inside when you reluctantly acquiesce because, well, “I’m gonna have to work closely with these people on the next project.” What’s going on? Is the lab ventilation working properly? Because this cannot possibly be a rational thought in the late twenty-teens, let alone in a STEM industry?
Like or like it not, self-advocacy and negotiating-while-womaning have gendered parameters. Women are taxed for our efficacy. OK. Yeah, it’s unfair. Life’s unfair. You can’t forget it or ignore it, for sure. But, to a certain extent, you gotta let it go, or at least relax your grip enough to move forward. Come on, let’s have a big, two-beat sigh. Innnnn, and oooooout. OK, now, let’s do that evolution thing, where we cultivate situational understanding to guide our adaptive advancement, as individual humans and as a community.
WEST Own It: Self-Advocacy & Negotiating-while-Womaning
Dr. Gay is back to lead another #WESTevent on January 30th to explain universal principles and techniques of psychology and negotiation for effective self-advocacy and negotiating-while-womaning. Dr. Gay’s presentation introduces practical ideas and doable approaches for effective human-to-human negotiation, that will enable you to own it without the social cost. Smash archaic gender stereotypes and stigmas. Join WEST to learn more about how you can own it all, the social and situational outcomes, like the boss negotiator you are.
